I, unfortunately, live in an era when words rule and actions mean nothing. I live in an era where people constantly judge based on half, or less, “facts”. I believe that the word “rumor” is much more accurate.

This is the list of questions I often ask people who feel obligated to tell me the truth. “You heard it from who? Where did they get their information? Was that person actually there? Did they truly WITNESS the event? And finally, “why are you so willing to believe a stranger, who got their information from someone who didn’t witness it all?”

Definitions:
Rumor – An unofficial, interesting story or piece of news that might be true or invented, and is communicated quickly from person to person. RUMOR | English meaning – Cambridge Dictionary

Fact – something that is known known to have happened or to exist, especially something for which proof exists, or about which there is information. FACT | English meaning – Cambridge Dictionary

Those people who tell me that they got their information from a reputable news source, well, they shouldn’t be allowed to enter the gene pool. Especially if they decide to give words new definitions to make them more digestible. What did Shakespeare say about roses? And, I will add to his wise words. An invasive weed is still an invasive weed, even if it’s called an orchid.

Everyone has an agenda, some corrupt, some not so much. Some want only the part of their news that they can quickly absorb and move on. Mostly people just want the sensational tidbits to gnaw on with others during their lunch break. Those so called reputable news sources want your attention. The bigger the audience, the more advertisers are willing to pay to place their ad in that particular time slot. And what has been said, repeatedly, about news stories? The more it bleeds the more it leads. No matter how much truth they share.

I understand that simply accepting what someone says is faster and easier than actually thinking. If everyone would just appreciate that they should have a grain of salt with their news, with any news, the idea that we should always question authority might become more than just a bumper sticker.

Does anyone remember playing the telephone game in elementary school? Remember the difference between the word that was first used and the last word? My point here is that no one had any ill intentions. Everyone was just passing on the word, or the news, that they heard whispered in their ear.

This happens when we speak out loud as well. The message changes oh so slightly each time the story is retold. Someone might use a difference word when repeating the information or they may emphasize one word over another. We humans ingest information according to our upbringing, education, social influences (music, movies, television, gossip magazines, podcasts and all other forms of media, public and personal gatherings) and life experiences. And our digestion is bogged down, altered, or varies, one might say, by our influencers. As we tend to have an insatiable appetite for the “leading news stories”, those telling the story know just the right words to speak, luring us in.

Life isn’t perfect, no matter how hard we try to fit it into the pretty, little perfect box. Life can be down right ugly. In stead of denying this, let’s normalize those unfortunate circumstances. Trying to wish them away, or insist that people with bad intentions behave, let’s appreciate the good and prepare for the bad. The bad, it shouldn’t be something shared at the lunch break. It shouldn’t be something whispered and gossiped. It also shouldn’t be a secret. Secrets keep the bad from becoming a lesson, from being understood, from being disinfected by the sunlight, from being so damn scary, and from being something we can receive support from our family and friends.

Being alone when the bad hits, that’s no place for anyone, no matter their bravery. Friends are only true friends when they know our secrets and still want to hangout. True friends don’t judge because they have secrets too.

So, the nitty gritty of it all is that we hear what we want to hear. We seek the story that most relates to what we believe we already know. It’s easy to hear the same message, over and over, because it is familiar and hence comfortable. Unfortunately the people who want to be comfortable are the people who tend to sway the direction of any movement.

Try hearing past what you expect to hear. Try understanding the meaning hidden behind your comfort. The truth is somewhere inside of all of us but sometimes the only way to expose it is to be uncomfortable.

E. T. Aka Annie